Occasionally, for the public good, I find that it's important to share significant information that I have come across. And in this case, I think you will agree that this information is nearly essential to living a happier, more fulfilled life.
When we go to New York, one of the places we have to hit is Brownie's drive in in Wilson. They serve Perry's ice cream, which is one of those regional brands that ought to be worldwide but then again oughtn't, so that it's sort of a secret. Every year they have a new flavor that makes me want to wallow in a tub filled with their ice-creamy goodness, and this year they most definitely did not disappoint.
Behold: Perry's Red Velvet ice cream. Red velvet flavored ice cream, with cream cheese flavored swirl.
Now, I know what you're thinking. "Okay, okay, enough with the trendy red velvet crap, yeah, it's probably good, but it's 10 times better in your head because you think you're being hip."
I say to you: Shut it.
I've been to Florence, okay? I've had freaking gelato that made me want to provide Mario behind the counter with whatever services he might have needed at the time. I've had Blizzards and Flurries and Gotta Have Its and A&W root beer floats. I've had Haagen Dazs and Ben & Jerry's and the flavor of the year at the UW dairy school. I'm from WISCONSIN. I don't just like ice cream--I UNDERSTAND ice cream.
And that was the BEST ICE CREAM I HAVE EVER HAD. Period. End of story.
But carrying ice cream home from New York is just not practical. Though I did explore the option of dry ice, I decided it was just best left in Wilson, at Brownies and all the other great drive-ins, and in my sweet memory of my short-lived but passionate affair with Perry's Red Velvet and a plastic spoon.
Enough joy, as it turned out, for me to drive 30 minutes to the nearest store that I knew would have it in stock. (Please ignore Duff on the container. We'll discuss bad cooking/reality shows later, and how I hate all these cakebaking series that are all over.)
Since then, I've been made aware that Ben & Jerry also make a red velvet ice cream. I'm sure it's lovely. But I can't offer any comment on it, and really, I think my red velvet ice cream search is going to be over before it begins. It's like when you really, really, really want a diet Coke and all you can get is diet Pepsi. Sure, if I'm dying of thirst, it'll work, and I won't die from it, but would I rather have actual soda instead of flat brown water? Yes yes I would.
And you know, for $3.89 and the price of gas, it wasn't bad. It's not Perry's. Sweet Jesus and the patron saint of ice cream, that's for sure. But it's pretty darn good. And so I give it the Reasonable Facsimile Stamp of Approval for coming close enough to do in a pinch.